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Author Topic: Ejaculation without orgasm  (Read 5166 times)
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Sismetic
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« on: April 20, 2016, 05:17:34 PM »

Im new to all this and have been trying to strengthen my PC muscles for a few months. At one time I did 300~ kegels, plus 10 contraction and releases in different forms for 10/20 seconds. So I thought I had good strength but what started happening was that before reaching the PONR I tried to gain control, squeeze and breathe deeply and not ejaculate and start again, building up to the PONR, but what happened was that I had a good sensation sometimes but not quite an orgasm, other times I felt a rush in my brain(hard to explain) but not quite an orgasm either, and recently what has started happening is that at times I can't control it(or I think im squeezing but maybe not hard or long enough?) and I ejaculate WITHOUT having an orgasm.

Also sometimes an emission comes out way before orgasm/ejaculation. It's not thick enough to be a full ejaculation I think, but it's white, but it's also way earlier in the session, when I'm not even that aroused, and if I kegel squeeze to try to hold it in, it seems as if I pump it out instead. Im also hard for time afterwards so I don't think it's an actual ejaculation, but it puzzles me what it is.

This has happened after I stopped doing kegels(as I feel as if my pelvic area has been tightening) for like a month and I started again.

Can someone point if Im in the right direction, if it's normal what I'm experiencing, if my kegels are right(I think that what I did was too much, but I could do it, when I think maybe I shouldn't be able to do that many kegels in one sitting, so maybe I'm not really doing kegels? Or if I was then why couldn't I stop my ejaculation?), and what can I do to de-stress my pelvic floor? Thanks in advance to all!
« Last Edit: April 20, 2016, 05:19:55 PM by Sismetic » Logged
SDragon
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« Reply #1 on: May 06, 2016, 06:30:35 PM »

It's normal.  Kegel exercises and control of the PC muscle is only part of the training and not the 'whole' answer to being MMO.  But it's the one that's marketed the most and is one of those '10 steps to having better sex' type things. 

Overworking your PC muscle and making it like iron should not be the main goal as I've mentioned in older posts, it's the PC muscle type of contractions that will trick your mind into thinking that it needs to ejaculate. 

Practice, practice, practice and eventually you'll be able to feel how everything works.  It's like driving a car, a new person is never comfortable and tends to overthink, be too tense and apply the wrong technique.  With enough practice, things become more natural and easy.
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nihtay
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« Reply #2 on: August 02, 2016, 11:06:24 AM »

I also had a session yesterday trying to achieve a dry orgasm from pure nipple stimulation.

What happened during ramping arousal was that I find it hard to "redirect" the arousal to other places- rubbing the belly for example, simply seems to cause it to "dissipate" instead of being redirected. I also find that at some point very close to the PONR, simply breathing can shoot me over the edge (or is it simply from the light rubbing against the underwear?)

upon reaching PONR, I was consciously trying to relax the PC as stated here http://www.malemultiple.org/index.php?topic=324.0,

What happened was that the orgasm was noticeably diminished, and I could feel the semen flowing out without contraction for the first second or so, but then it became too hard to relax and the contractions began. At the end of it I knew that I had hit refractory period, and the penis had gone soft, but there were some lingering arousal instead of feeling completely drained.

Was that just an attempt that wasn't a 100% failure? I've had past practice where similar things occurred, like the topic creator where ejaculation occurred with no orgasm, but never the other way round...


Ediit: Tried again tonight, this time using the clamp method. might have experienced something akin to orgasmic "pulses", that pop up every second, (with increasing intensity) for about 6 times. Nothing wave-like though, or "altered consciousness-like". Could this be considered MMO?

I know for certain I couldn't control it though, it was like a coin balanced on a needle, the coin was bound to fall (ejaculation), it was only a matter of how many random wobbles (pulses) before it got to that point. Nothing like how people were saying  they could relax without fear of ejaculation. The pulses also ramped to a point where I knew I had to have the release from ejaculation as it was too much arousal to just ignore.

I also find that around 6-10 ( with 10 being PONR), non penile stimulation provide diminishing returns and it becomes almost imperative to use light penile stimulation to edge towards 10. Am I doing something wrong or just being impatient?

Thanks for any input


« Last Edit: August 03, 2016, 12:13:36 AM by nihtay » Logged
brickbat
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« Reply #3 on: August 16, 2016, 04:51:42 PM »

Nihtay

I am a guy like you who is deeply into nipple play, relaxing and shaft edging/stroking.  I have a friend on Thundersplace (penis enlargement website) whose handle is Werner Ashford.  He has rewired his whole prostate and sexuality by shaft edging. His thread is on ballooning if you search his name and thread title.

For me, I have several months in of dry Os and several total body Os using shaft edging, nipple play, relaxing, focusing on minute pleasure, encouraging it to build, and savoring it as it relaxes and builds.

One important thing I have learned is to do in this deeply relaxed state is that I must put my ego aside and what I want to feel.  It is like stepping out or aside from my body, and letting the dry O experiences take me or take control of me.  At some point, I can feel that I am not in control, but the P waves (pleasure waves) and orgasmic feeling are in control being produced involuntarily.

I am having a good time with this new discovery on my part as I approach 70 years of age.  Arousal will build so beautifully and my dick most times will be hard as a rock with my prostate firing out pleasure to my shaft and urethra.  It is many times sheer bliss.

As for the sexual energy, I can move that mentally by focusing on where I want it to go. 

I have said all this to say that MMOs can be reached in several ways and each man has his own journey to dry Os and super Os. Some use the aneros, some use edging and kegels at the PONR, but for me, my nipples light a fire in my prostate and groin and dick as I tweak my nipples and relax deeply into the feelings, setting myself aside, allowing the orgasmic feelings to grow, build, and take control involuntarily of my body with my ego and what I want out of the way.

I hope this helps.

All this takes work.  Keepitupjohnsons book really lit my MMO fire, but I dont think at my age I could achieve MMOs without nipple stimulation. 
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nihtay
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« Reply #4 on: August 18, 2016, 10:53:41 AM »

Thanks for your reply brickbat, it's been a while and I thought the newbie board was left to dust!

Unfortunately I'm much younger in my twenties and Asian, so I'm not sure how much of the advice across the forum board is applicable to my situation (the libido, body testosterone level and receptiveness to testosterone, arousal rate and frequency etc are all up for debate)

The thing about trying to build arousal while keeping relax is that you have to have iron-clad focus doing it, or 10 minutes down the road you will be on auto-pilot mode doing ocassional stimulation without consciously recalling that it's suppose to be a "session"

I think it doesn't help that the only time I have to practise this is at bedtime. Ramping up arousal without release just leads to being unable to sleep, so the functional need to ejaculate to get that dose of sleepiness is very welcomed, which doesn't help with the training at all...

Might I trouble you for advice with either of these two issues?
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brickbat
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« Reply #5 on: August 19, 2016, 12:06:28 PM »

The thing about trying to build arousal while keeping relax is that you have to have iron-clad focus doing it, or 10 minutes down the road you will be on auto-pilot mode doing ocassional stimulation without consciously recalling that it's suppose to be a "session


Hey Bro.  Enjoy your youth.  You can get this at your age and you will and you will have a lifetime of pleasure in sex and solo.  This stuff is the fountain of youth. It involves a learning curve and it is a process to learn.  Dont be put off or dismayed at the process.  Enjoy each orgasmic feeling to the max.  I wish I were your age and discovering this.

I dont understand what you meant by what happens to your body after 10 minutes.  Could you explain.  

In your first post above, you mentioned something about feeling pulses.  Bro, for me, the pulses start with arousal and nipple stimulation and shaft only edging.  When I put my ego and what I want aside and focusing on the pleasure of the pulses or whatever I am feeling, the pleasures builds with relaxation in my groin muscles and my enjoying what is happening IN THE MOMENT, again while trying not to control anything, but allowing and encouraging the pleasure to build and become just like an orgasm, but without ejaculation..........

This is a process bro and you should just relax and enjoy whatever your body provides as the process develops day by day.  

This morning I was hot for dry orgasms.  I storked my semi dick and tweaked my nipples concentrating on the pleasure in the moment that was being produced in my dick and prostate.  I put myself aside any expectations and was going at it for the sheer pleasure of the moment encouraging mentally the good feelings to build to a pulsing orgasm.  In about fifty strokes the orgasmic pulsing began and I put my ego aside and encouraged mentally those feelings to build and intensify. They did.  I had some wonderful dry orgasms this morning in very short time periods of shaft edging and nipple play. Once I was only about 80% hard during the dry O as it came on me so quickly with relatively few shaft strokes, but deep relaxation and focus on the pleasure.

At your age, I would encourage you, if you do this at night, to go ahead, get relief and jack off (for me with no fantasy or lust) at the end of your sessions using nipple play to enhance your wet orgasm just like you use nipple play to get arousal building in your body.

The key to all this is to stay focused and connected as to what is going on in your body.  For me, even fantasizing about my wife and great times we have had in the sack misdirects me and takes me away mentally from the pleasure going on in my prostate, dick, balls, wherever.  Thats me.  I do know this takes mental focus which should be relaxed mental focus. If you are wearing yourself out mentally, son, you are trying too hard and you probably have expectations of what the orgasm should feel like.  Let go of expectations and control.  Learn to orgasm much as a woman orgasms in sex relaxing and focusing on the pleasure of her clit or vagina and letting the good feelings build until they start moaning and bucking and have an orgasm sometimes that makes them tingle all over.  Thats our goal.  Developing total body orgasms and I have only had a few. It takes time to build that much arousal and time to work with very light shaft touching while encouraging the waves to flow over your whole body ............all the time trying not to spurt.  

Another thing, son.  Have you noticed that there is a link between the build up of pleasure and your thursting your hips as arousal and feeling build.  For me that is true.  Hope you can get this going too.

I dont want to confuse you.  Put your time in. It will be worth it at your age as you will have a lifetime to enjoy this MMO business in sex and solo for your entire life.

Hope this helps.
« Last Edit: August 19, 2016, 12:09:08 PM by brickbat » Logged
nihtay
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« Reply #6 on: August 19, 2016, 07:52:09 PM »

Hi brickbat- thanks for the reply and encouragement!


Mostly I am concerned about the technicalities of learning this, and how my body (hardly) responses to stimulation. I am pretty certain the layman way of masturbation involves jerking the shaft up and down and for me this has nothing to do with the shaft, and arousal only comes from downstrokes when the frenulum is tugged (I'm uncircumcized). I'm pretty sure the frenulum is a No Go when it comes to mind-based orgasms instead of conventional penile orgasms. I've tried to "cultivate" other spots, like light touching the stomach, rolling the scrotum, rubbing the perineum, rubbing the earlobes, the best I can do to name those sensations are "ticklish", and nowhere near "arousing". So this has let to almost the nipples being the one other non-penile erogenous zone available.


What I meant about the focus after 10 minutes, is like you said, staying focused is tough, because the mind wanders easily, so you end up becoming half-consciously doing what you're doing then, and forgot that you settled down intending for that 1 hour or so to be a "session", and instead of being aware of your body's sensations your mind's just blank and not concentrating on anything.


I think it's also possible that I'm experiencing some or all of these problems because I've been masturbating almost daily ever since puberty to get to sleep, so I haven't really given my body the chance to build up libido over days since it keeps dissipating with every ejaculation.

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brickbat
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« Reply #7 on: August 22, 2016, 04:28:03 PM »

Hey Son/nihtay

For me, I had years of tweaking my nipples while lightly massaging any of the areas you mentioned.  When I tweaked my nipples and focused on pleasure in the area I was lightly stroking, orgasmic pleasure built in that area of my body I was lightly massaging, be it my thighs, my belly, my belly button, my perineum, my legs and upper torso.  Mantaks Chias micro cosmic orbit is real and you can move energy from your pelvis to your brian and b back down the front of your torso to your prostate for a small explosion in your prostate the more you learn to do this.

All I can tell you son is to work at it.  It will be worth it at all costs.  Dont stop.  

Another thing I did on my journey was to tweak both nipples while say sitting in a chair and relax and mentally direct the sexual energy from my prostate to any area of my body I wanted it to go.  The more you and I work with this, the more the rewiring takes place.

I was frustrated at many points, but last October when I had privacy, I took my dick and stroked the shaft while tweaking a nipple.  The orgasmic pleasure in my dick was expressed in P waves or pleasant feelings.  I concentrated and focused on the P Waves, encouraged them mentally to build while I relaxed my pelvic floor muscles and my whole body.  Presto........I had a dry Orgasm.

I am uncircumcised too.  I love my foreskin and the looseness of the skin on my erect shaft.  Why not tweak your nipple softly and stroke your shaft softly.  It it takes frenulum stretching down your shaft to make you feel orgasmic, work with that and just dont over heat.  The frenulum and glans are more quick to over heat and make you ejaculate as you know.  Just relax your pelvic floor and ABOVE ALL, enjoy what you are feeling in your dick and prostate and belly or whereever the orgasmic feelings move.  Dont control these feelings.  Yield to them and immerse yourself in the pleasure they are bringing you and relax into the feelings like you are being drawn into a spiral or worldpool like feeling.  Let it build. If you heat up and feel like you are moving to ejaculation, stop and relax and let it subside .......then go at it again.  The pleasure should build.  

Go from one nipple to the other while you stroke realizing that your nipples can get insensitive if you tweak them too hard.  Soft tweaking like you are making love to yourself is better than hard tweaking.

This is the opposite of how we men masturbate.  It is not grabbing your dick and focusing on making yourself come. It is how a woman orgasms in sex by relaxing focusing on the pleasant feelings her husband dick in her and his sucking of her nipples during his thrusting  while she concentrates on the good feelings and then has her orgasm that goes all over her body.

Work with this son. It will be worth it.  You will have many years of pleasure in solo and in sex with your sweetie .............

Hope this helps
« Last Edit: August 22, 2016, 04:33:36 PM by brickbat » Logged
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