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Author Topic: My Situation | Suggestions?  (Read 4985 times)
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multiplelove
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« on: September 30, 2014, 11:00:36 AM »

Good morning. I was eager to find a forum for "male multiple orgasms" and hooray! I found what I was looking for. Great posts and great information. I'm hopeful that someone here can help me out.

BACKGROUND:
I've been happily married for over 20 years in a monogamous relationship. Our sex life during those 20 years has been outstanding. I never practiced "self-cultivation" (aka masturbation) during that time until this past year. Everything about my/our sex life has been terrific and I wanted to enhance it by being able to enjoy multiple orgasms, full-body orgasms and basically take it to the next level.
I've developed a strong PC muscle over the years and can stop my urine flow in mid-stream. I've become quite familiar with my arousal process/progress and know when the PONR is imminent. Since reading "The Multi-Orgasmic Man" by Mantak Chia a couple of weeks ago, I've been "practicing" daily to achieve my first multiple-orgasm/full-body orgasm.

PROBLEM:
While I can successfully "clamp down" and prevent an ejaculation ("dry orgasm") ... I go soft and flaccid afterward. The desire I feel is still there. I don't feel tired and sleepy and it all feels "good" but I can't get that 2nd or 3rd or more orgasm.

STEPS:
1. Each self-cultivation session lasts about 20 minutes.
2. I slowly build up the sexual energy by touching various parts of my body - not just my genital region.
3. Sometimes I use a masturbation sleeve, sometimes just my hand.
4. I edge a few times, bringing myself close to the PONR but by taking a deep breath, squeezing my PC muscle, etc. I avoid it and move on.
5. At this point, I feel unsatisfied. I have a LOT of sexual energy going on and would feel frustrated and unsatisfied if I were to walk away at this point.
6. So I continue and press closer ... till I finally cross over the PONR. I squeeze real tight, hold my breath, and feel the mild throbbings of an orgasm. NO ejaculation however. All feels good.
7. I continue to stroke ... being able to go as fast as I want now ... but to no avail. I become flaccid and I'm done in a matter of a few minutes.
8. No retrograde ejaculation has occurred either. No cloudy urine.

What am I doing wrong? What am I missing? I anxiously await to hear your suggestions and to answer any questions. Thank-you for allowing me to share.
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KeepitupJohnson
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« Reply #1 on: October 01, 2014, 11:45:08 AM »

Congratulations on living a wonderful life. You've done well. I believe I can say that to everyone. There's no need to compare ourselves to anyone else. We're all unique.

Re: your question. I think you are having retrograde ejaculations. Why do I think that? Because you said you couldn't get hard again - that's a sign of ejaculation.

What is a retrograde ejaculation? You suck in with your PC muscles during orgasm, and you suck the sperm right into your bladder.

How can you be certain it's a retrograde ejaculation?

After orgasm, pee directly into a glass. Let the glass stand for at least 15 minutes, then look at the pee. Do you see a white cloud in the middle of the pee? That white cloud is semen.

Are retrograde ejaculations dangerous?
No. I've had plenty of them. No worries.

I know Mantak Chia, and I like his books, especially the Multi-orgasmic Couple. I wrote Love Satisfies (available from amazon.com)to share the physical and mental feelings involved in the making of a dry orgasm. 100 custom drawings actually give the feel. My word processor says I wrote at the 5.7 grade level, I am pleased with that!

Keep asking questions. When we all work together to reach a common goal, miracles happen. Your posts on this forum help everyone. Let us know what happens.

Peace and love, Keepitup Johnson
« Last Edit: October 01, 2014, 12:07:40 PM by KeepitupJohnson » Logged

Keepitup Johnson, author of Love Satisfies, how to have infinite male multiple orgasms, available from Amazon.com
multiplelove
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« Reply #2 on: October 01, 2014, 04:04:24 PM »

Thank-you SO much for the reply. When I've urinated after a self-cultivation session in the past, I assumed that the urine looked clear and fine. I'll try it in a cup though and let it set and see what the results are.

I'm curious though ... when using the PC muscle, you say not to "suck in with the PC muscles during orgasm." If I am having a retrograde orgasm, what do I need to change. Is it more of pushing "out" with the PC muscle rather than sucking in with it? Is my timing off?
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multiplelove
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« Reply #3 on: October 02, 2014, 11:31:05 AM »

UPDATE: I had a 20-minute "practice" session last night with similar results. Although the "dry orgasm" did seem to be a little stronger than previous ones. But again, I lost my erection when all was said and done. So I urinated into a bottle and let it sit for 30 minutes. That's when I noticed that there was a small amount of semen that collected towards the top ... not a lot, but some. I concluded that my timing must be off. I think I'm squeezing the PC muscle tight enough and shutting most of the flow down, but apparently not soon enough.

Therefore, I think I need to start clamping down just a little bit sooner. Not so much that I miss the orgasmic feelings, but enough to prevent any semen from getting into the mix of things and ending up in the urine.

Am I correct in my assessment and if so, any hints, tips, or suggestions on how to do so? Thanks!
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KeepitupJohnson
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« Reply #4 on: October 04, 2014, 10:50:59 AM »

Kudos for expressing yourself! Your instant feedback is wonderful. Instant feedback helps us grow. I’ll respond faster next time.
It’s clear that you can use your PC muscles to control ejaculation. How’s your mental control? Are you in control of your mental fantasies, or do they sometimes heat up suddenly and become too hot to handle? I’ve found that a hot thought can pry open my sperm gates a little bit, and I feel a little sperm slip out. Pay close attention to what you’re feeling. When you’re in the present moment, you can feel every little thing.
Thinking about PC mechanics takes you out of the moment. Thinking about “how to do what” introduces tension in your body. When you think about how to do what, the dry orgasm police make you tense, and this can break you open. I suggest you make a private, relaxed appointment and consult with Dr. Jerkoff. Ha! Touch, feel, and confidence are all you need.

From my book, Love Satisfies . . .
Dry orgasms live in the space between the triggering of an orgasm and ejaculating. As you practice, this space grows bigger. With practice, you discover that you can trigger the orgasm and delay the onset of ejaculation. Then, you can delay the onset of ejaculation a little longer. Finally, you can delay ejaculation as long as you want. The space between triggering an orgasm and ejaculating has grown huge.

There are cool pictures in Love Satisfies, showing when to release the PC muscles at the right moment.

Keep asking questions.
Peace and love, Keepitup Johnson

We'll try something different each time till you get it
« Last Edit: October 05, 2014, 01:04:53 PM by KeepitupJohnson » Logged

Keepitup Johnson, author of Love Satisfies, how to have infinite male multiple orgasms, available from Amazon.com
multiplelove
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« Reply #5 on: October 05, 2014, 10:40:42 AM »

Thank-you for your help and reply back. I do look forward to reading your book ... but need to wait for my next "book allowance."  Cool

I do feel like I'm in the present for the most part. There are times where it seems like it's taking "forever" to reach the point of orgasm and I'll use occasional fantasies to help get me there (ironically, they're of my wife, which is nice Smiley ... for some reason it seems of late that it's taking longer to get there. Maybe it's because I'm practicing every day. I do know that thinking about the mechanics of it all can sometimes take you out of the moment.

But here's what I experienced this morning: I had a practice session with all the normal routine. On an arousal scale of 1-10 (10 being the PONR), I worked myself up to an 8 or a 9 and rode that "edging" feeling for a few minutes. My strokes slowed down and it felt great. I knew that if I intensified the stroking in the slightest bit that it would put me over the edge. I was still in control and was waiting to decide if I was ready to give this another shot. As soon as I was, I put the clamps down and squeezed my PC muscle, intensified the stroking and within seconds I felt the dry orgasm - increased heart rate, small throbbings and pulsings, etc. But when it was done, I felt my penis become flaccid and everything dissipated ... again! I felt nothing as far as the feeling of the semen being released from the prostate and making its trek south. I thought that by squeezing before the fireworks began and I pushed the kayak over the waterfall that I would be in good shape ... but apparently not. So I urinated a few minutes later into my pee bottle ... checked in 30 minutes later and surprisingly, no semen this time. That's good news I suppose - no retrograde ejaculation - but at the same time, it just confuses me even more. Not sure what to try next.

Thoughts? Suggestions?
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KeepitupJohnson
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« Reply #6 on: October 05, 2014, 01:32:08 PM »

Good for you!  I also only fantasize about my lover. Its good for us men.
Most likely you're doing everything exactly right.
Regardless of what is going on,  taking a break from sex for a few days or nights or a week is a great idea.

I often squeeze my PC's before I stroke to trigger a dry orgasm, like you described. There's no reason not to.  Squeezing contains the pressure so you can stroke without boiling over (ejaculating).
The wording you used (I put the clamps down and I squeezed my PC muscle) leads me to suggest easing into orgasm with less pressure. Gentle lovemaking (solo or partnered) builds less pressure to ejaculate.
When there's less pressure to ejaculate,  then you can squeeze less hard and release the squeeze sooner.
When I use my PC muscles to hold back sperm, I use the least amount of pressure for the shortest period of time possible.
I release my PC muscles and relax completely as soon as I trigger orgasm. More info is available in Love Satisfies.

 I can also move excess,  sexual pressure out of my penis. It's easy. Part 2 of my book Love Satisfies shows how. It's helpful to trigger orgasm with less pressure in the penis.

Keepitup.

« Last Edit: October 05, 2014, 02:33:58 PM by KeepitupJohnson » Logged

Keepitup Johnson, author of Love Satisfies, how to have infinite male multiple orgasms, available from Amazon.com
multiplelove
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« Reply #7 on: October 09, 2014, 12:12:48 PM »

Well ... I'm happy to report that I can now classify myself as a "multi-orgasmic-male." Hooray!  Cheesy

I had a few more "practice" sessions since my last post ... some with success, some without. But needless to say, I feel I'm on the right path. I think my key was to tighten the PC muscle just a little bit earlier than I was previously doing. This seemed to make the biggest difference. I also found out for myself (even though I've read it elsewhere) that bringing myself to the PONR too quickly (either through fantasies, etc.) makes it harder to hold back. It just comes in too hot and heavy and harder to control. Taking my time to get there really helps ... and overall, it's a much better, relaxing, enjoyable experience.

This morning, I was able to have 5 in a row with each one becoming a bit more powerful. I couldn't hold it any more on the 5th one and ejaculated. I have a long way to go with much more practice involved, but I feel I'm on the right path. Next up? Trying it with my loving and supportive partner ... who by the way, was there stroking me when I had my first multiple orgasm. How cool is that?

Thanks for the help and posts.
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multiplelove
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« Reply #8 on: October 29, 2014, 11:10:22 AM »

I thought I had it ... thought I was on the road to success ... but I'm not. I still can't seem to have a dry orgasm.

I bought the book "Love Satisfies" and I was impressed ... great book with tremendous information. I had read the Multi-Orgasmic Man first. It set the tone. And there were some more laymen terms and information presented in Love Satisfies that made sense, especially the part on energy work (although that's something that I still need to practice).

I feel as if I'm following the steps and doing everything right. No porn, no fast masturbation session, being present, enjoying the moment, etc. I can edge for as long as I want. I can hold it back. I can feel the energy move to other parts of the body. I can push myself right to the edge and yet be in control. When I finally do decide that I want to push the kayak over the falls so to speak and hit the point-of-no-return, I squeeze/suck-in the PC muscle to close the gates and feel the euphoria of an orgasm. Nothing ejaculates. But then ... I go flaccid and the shows over. I can't get to that elusive 2nd (or more) orgasm. Yes, it's a dry orgasm ... but unfortunately, it's also a retrograde ejaculation.

I check my urine afterwards (in a mason jar, about 10 minutes later) and sure enough, there's semen in the urine. Not a lot, but enough that it explains it. Therefore, what more can I do? What am I doing wrong? I am totally stumped and getting frustrated at something that should be enjoyable. Thoughts? Suggestions?
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